Munchkin Discovers Secret to Muslim Violence!
Hey peeps, you read that correct, little ol’ ME, your friendly neighborhood pint-sized Toy Fox Terrier has single pawedly discovered what makes Muslims so damn violent. It is all due to their being sexually oppressed and frustrated, and that is also why they hate Western culture so much. Read on for the details.
I know, some of you are thinking that I have been hanging around my Daddy too long and have lost my mind, but hear me out and see if the pieces don’t fall into place. Now let me explain and educate you along the way.
In Muslim countries that are under Sharia Law, women are not allowed to fraternize with members of the opposite sex if that person(s) are not related, such as their brother, father, husband, son, etc. To violate this law could result in severe punishment that may range from being lashed to death by stoning. Now, for those of you who may have received your education in the public school system, to fraternize could mean sitting together in a coffee shop, riding together in a car or just standing and chatting on a street corner.
Also, under Sharia Law, when a woman appears in public, she MUST wear a head scarf, or if the country is really strict, she must wear a burka which looks like a glorified gunny sack, that covers the poor women from head to foot. This makes it rather difficult for one to flirt.
But, as bad as this is for the females, what sort of effect do you think this has on the males, the poor horney twerps? These poor guys grow up with no idea of what a woman looks like, other then their mothers, grandmothers, aunts and sisters, if they are lucky.
Now, if a man in a Muslim country fraternizes with an unrelated woman, he isn’t treated as harshly as the woman (I guess because the law feels that the sexual frustration the man goes through is punishment enough) and that sure can put a damper on picking your future wife, if you don’t know what she looks like ahead of time, and all of your prospects are being lashed and stoned. If she is stoned, of course she dies and you can’t marry a corpse, at least not if you are in your right mind, but if the one you had your eye on is just lashed, that leaves some pretty ugly scars and that sort of thing will turn a lot men off.
So, the result of all this is a whole population of horney and sexually frustrated men who, from the time they enter puberty until Allah calls them home, spend most of their time alone with Miss Palmina and her five sisters, getting angrier by the minute as they seek ways to vent their anger and frustration, voila! Suicide bombings and beheadings, yea, that’s the ticket.
Now, the religious police in Saudi Arabia have decided that they must ratchet up the sexual frustration a notch or two for their own perverse pleasure (the little sadist bastards). Normally, these religious cops just concern themselves with bullying women into covering up and making sure that men get their butts to the mosques on time for the prayers, but now they have decided to go after dogs and cats. NO! NOT TO MAKE THEM WEAR BURKAS! But rather to frustrate the human population even more.
How, you ask? Here is how: The holy schmucks called religious police have issued a decree banning the sale of pets, which they claim is a sign of Western influence. Now wait, stick with me, because this gets better.
The Muslim ban on dogs is really not much of a surprise, because conservative Muslims hate us dogs and view us as being unclean, geeze, look who is calling the kettle black, have you ever smelled a sweaty Muslim, especially after they have scarfed down a mess of garlic? Peeeew!! But the ban on cats (ban as many of them as you want) is kinda puzzling when one considers that the Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon his pea brain) supposedly loved cats.
You see, the religious police, known as Muttawa, (that’s the sound a camel makes when it up-chucks) besides having the duty to enforce Saudi Arabia’s strict Islamic code, by prowling the streets and malls to ensure that unmarried men and women do not fraternize, the government also gives them free reign to come up with and enforce whatever laws they deem necessary to maintain social order, so they figure that owning a cat or dog is a threat to social order, but why? Well, it appears that one of the reasons, besides the Islamists feeling that just like fast food joints, shorts, jeans and pop music, pet ownership smacked of Western influence, but they claim that men have been walking their pet dogs and cats in public to entice women into conversation and flirting with them, and that has got to stop.
So, think about it, if you weren’t allowed to flirt and pick your own mate, wouldn’t you want to blow things up and cut people’s heads off? That is why they hate the West so much; it isn’t because we don’t worship Allah. It is because people here get to do all the things they cannot. The only thing is they have been so screwed up in their heads, that instead of blowing up their Mullahs (another sound made by a camel when it farts) and Mosques, and throwing off the yoke of their oppression and frustration, they want to force us to be as oppressed and frustrated as they are instead.
There you have it in a nutshell. Now, I am going to do the “boot-scoot” boogie across the living room rug, climb up on the sofa in front of the fan and take a nap until dinner time. See you all next Saturday.
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